I don't know!

things are always kept hidden away. perhaps i felt better saying it out. but then i start to feel the guilt i used to felt again. it's really hard to convey a message without knowing how the person will feel later on. im getting really tired. too tired to try anything. the more i talk about it, the more i realised how impossible it is to be like before. and sometimes, perhaps love is not really about two people, but everything about the two people, compatabilities plays a big part too. and when you think about it, you feel so much inferior. although they say it's the opposites that attracts. i know if things goes on the same way it does now, nothing will be fulfilled. nothing will change. it's always just me hearing those unfriendly phrase. no one's ever happy to hear those things. no one will be. no one will like to see the back of someone you like to disappear so fast without any warnings. no one likes silence. everyone wants to be cared by someone. if only it's always the case... the most difficult thing is to live your life with both happy and unhappy stuff going on at the same time. it's hard to juggle. and you feel so much worst than just sadness. coz you don't know what you're feeling. you became stuck in-between a real and surreal world. Perhaps this story should just be ended. There's always so much i want to say. but im not good with words, whatever language it may be. i try to put these things deep down and smile. at least i know my smile can make others happier. aarrrhhhh..! sigh... if you ask me what's going on, i wouldn't know either. i'm just feeling so "filled"? i just know i ain't happy.

~Kaze

I've stopped crying,
why does my eye hurts so much then?