Countdown to destruction...

I don't know what people think of me... I don't know how they think of me... But why am I thinking that they're thinking badly of me... I'm always trying my best to make people think of me better... at least not as a bad guy... But end up sometimes people just constantly think badly of me. Is it becoz I'm not trying hard enough? or is it becoz they're just constantly looking into bad things, thinking badly of other people? I know I'm not a nice guy... Not a very nice guy... But I'm trying my best here. It's tiring trying so hard sometimes. Everything I do, I hope to achieve peace and harmony and make everyone like me. But it seems like the more I try, the more I'm not achieving that peace and harmony. "Just be yourself" I know...I AM being myself... you may say I think too much...but sometimes I just know, I just know that another person is thinking badly of me. I can see...I can sense.

FUK this mind of mine...I'm breaking down, I'm exploding! Let it explode! just Let it be...

So DAMN fucked up nowadays...I'm just a fukkin bad guy. Don't need to care about me. Nobody cares anyway. Nobody's there for me when I need one. I still "haha" infront of them...without showing it. Coz I don't want them to think badly of me, yet again. FUCK my MIND!

and I'm sick of people asking me what happened. You can help by not asking to stress my mind further more...What I need is someone just sitting beside me...or just accompanying me...I don't want people to ask me what happened...but cheer me up pls...I don't want people to talk to me just becoz they wanna know what happened, I want people to talk to me becoz they really care! I'm just a motherfuckin lonely wierdo who's gonna explode soon... just like gary said...EXPLODing soon. COUNTDOWN......to destruction... =.="

Thanks.
~Kaze