Cry for me

Can't believe I didn't do any work for the whole day...except some pasting and writing. I can't stop thinking...there used to be so much messages to keep me busy everyday. But now I don't even have to check on my phone coz I know it won't ring. Sometimes all I want to know is how are you...? Are you doing fine? Well I guess you are...perhaps I just feel so alone now, that's all. It's just an excuse to talk to you, or rather, hear your voice, just like you've asked me on the phone that day, "ni zhe ji tian guo de hai hao ma?" and when I asked why am I doing all the talking, you said you called to hear me talk. That's just how I'm feeling now. But I know what will happen if I've called you, I heard you talking on the phone with other people, and so far all phone calls didn't lasted as long as the one we've had...... I know the more we carry on this silence, we will ultimately become strangers in the years to come. There's so much I wanna say, so much I wanna ask, but I know I won't get the answer I want. Thinking back, you used to encourage me to tell the person I like bravely, and for you, you can still be friends with that person even if you two can't be together. Well, I certainly hope so...but well, then again, how am I gonna forget you if this is the case? People asking me to give up, and this song on my blog just sing out how I feel..."Be be your love"

Something I wrote:

It wasn't a surprise I went alone,
It's been a long time since I go for a walk on my own.
It was raining whole day long,
And so I begin my journey stepping on the water.
Rain poured on me but I wasn't frightened,
For there's nothing for me to fear.
They felt that loneliness inside me and they took pity on me,
They cried for me.

Oh, this day I have not fallen,
For I'm still not alone.
I could see no one,
But I know there's someone out there crying for me.

I continued my journey walking on the lonely streets.
Among the crowd, I think,
What am I doing here?
Why do I head north, when I don't even know where I want to go?
I took photos of places I've been,
But I've found no where that I belong.
I looked at everyone around me,
But still, I can't find that person I want to meet,
That someone who's crying for me.

Oh, god, surely I believe in you,
But where are you tonight?
Why did you desert me,
Like how everyone did?

Oh, god, if you really does exist,
Can you even hear me weeps?
It seems like nobody could hear my cry,
For my heart has no throat.
Perhaps, it had just died.

Thanks.
~Kaze